


Nightmares

by SPN_DeanCas



Series: Destiel One-shots [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Human Castiel, M/M, Nightmares
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-29
Updated: 2018-09-29
Packaged: 2019-07-06 12:43:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15886293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SPN_DeanCas/pseuds/SPN_DeanCas
Summary: Cas is human again. Being human has many perks, but also many downfalls - nightmares being one of them.





	Nightmares

_Running._

_He's running as fast as he can, hoping to get to Sam before Dean does. But it's not Dean. It hasn't been Dean since he said yes to Michael. The archangel is wearing Dean's beautiful face and causing so much chaos. Everyone had been searching for him ever since he disappeared after killing Lucifer. One problem had been solved, but another emerged._

_Sam, Castiel and Jack are trying to stop him. Dean's in there somewhere, Cas can feel it. Sam is lying on the floor, drenched in his own blood, and Jack is refusing to use his powers - scared that he'd hurt Dean. Cas gets his attention, hoping to save Sam. Green eyes stare back at him. Looking at him now, Cas can see that it's not his dean._

_"Dean?" He hesitates._

_Dean's laughter filled his ears. "Dean is no longer available", Michael says in Dean's voice._

_Castiel closes his eyes for a second before focusing on Dean. "Dean? Please. I know you're in there. You have to fight him", he says._

_Michael storms towards him in anger, wrapping his hand around Castiel's throat. He leans in, close enough for Cas to be able to count all the freckles on Dean's face. An evil smirk appeared on his lips. "You want him back. Because you're in love with him", Michael says. Castiel doesn't say anything. "He's in love with you too, you know?" Castiel freezes.  
_

_Michael laughs. "I'm just kidding! He can't stand to look at you. He hates you, Castiel. Ever since he met you, his life has been filled with pain and sorrow. He wishes you'd die and stay dead. He'd be happier. He's better off without you. Why do you think he kicked you out of the bunker when you were human? He wants nothing to do with you, why can't you see that?"_

_Castiel forced himself not to cry. "You're lying", he choked out._

_Michael raised an eyebrow. "Really? Let's see how he reacts to you being human again". Suddenly, Michael was obtaining Castiel's grace. His throat was healed before Michael threw him across the room. He landed on the floor, coughing up blood. Sam and Jack ran to his side immediately; Jack healing his wounds as best he could._

_"Stop!" Michael yelled._

_All attention turned to the archangel. He looked in pain. "Get out!" He yelled in anger. But there was something different about him. Castiel struggled to stand, which resulted in him leaning on Sam and Jack. Everyone watched as Dean fought to get control. "I don't think so", Michael said, gaining control. "You sit back there and enjoy the show"._

_He doubled over in pain before standing up in a panic. The archangel blade was in his hand as he looked at Sam, Cas and Jack. "I'm sorry", Michael - no, Dean - said before pushing the blade into his stomach. His eyes widened in pain. Everyone ran to him as he collapsed onto the floor. Sam held his brother in his arms, tears already falling._

_"Dean", Sam began. "Stay with us, we'll save you. You'll be okay"._

_Dean grabbed Sam's hand. "Protect them", he whispered before closing his eyes._

_"Dean?" Sam asked. "No, no, no, no! Please!"_

 

Castiel woke up panting. Quickly, he wiped away his tears and forced himself out of bed. He checked the clock on the night stand: 5am. He walked around the bunker to the kitchen to make himself a mug of coffee. He sat at the table alone. Everyone else was still asleep, so he would be able to think quietly for a while. There's a lot of things he needs to think about.

"Struggling to sleep?" A deep voice said from behind him.

Frantically, he turned around to see Dean smiling at him. He instantly calmed. He watched as Dean made himself a mug of coffee and joined Cas at the table. "Yeah, I'm just not used to sleeping", he lied. Dean sat opposite him, hands wrapped around the mug. "Don't worry about me. How are you, Dean?" He asked, looking into the green eyes he loves.

_His Dean._

"I'm good", Dean replied. "Better than I expected. I didn't expect to survive, but here I am".

"You are a warrior", Cas stated.

Dean looked down and smiled at his coffee. "Yeah, unfortunately". They sat in silence for a while, until Dean spoke up. "I know I've already said this, but I need you to know that everything I said, wasn't me. Michael was just hoping to mess with your head, and nothing was true. I don't want you to leave, ever. I want you here, with me. You're family, and I'm happier when you're here. I just want you to know that".

Cas smiled at him. "Yes, Dean. I know".

Dean visibly relaxed. "Good, because I don't want you thinking the wrong things".

"Never".

"Well, Sam and I have got a case two states over", Dean began. "You can come with us, if you'd like. We could teach you how to hunt, considering you'll be staying with us and you're human now. I think we should teach you everything we know. What do you say? Are you up for it?" He asked, standing up from his chair.

"Sure", Cas replied. "It's better than doing nothing".

Dean smiled widely. "Awesome! We'll be leaving at 7 so get ready", he said before leaving the kitchen.

They had been driving for a couple hours when Cas felt himself falling asleep. He forced himself to stay awake, too afraid to fall asleep. Luckily, they were pulling into a motel. Once the car was parked, Dean booked a room and guided everyone to the room. He got a room with three beds and a pull out couch. Jack doesn't sleep much, so the couch was for him.

"Okay", Dean began. "Sam and Jack go out for food run, I'll start on research, and Cas will sleep".

"Wait, what?" Cas asked.

Dean looked at him in concern. "You were struggling to keep your eyes open on the way here. Just get a couple hours of shut eye and then we'll hunt. Hopefully, I'd have been able to figure out what we're hunting by the time you wake up". Cas tried to protest, but Dean stopped him. "Cas. Seriously. Go to bed. I'll be here when you wake up. We're not going anywhere".

Admitting defeat, Cas crawled into his bed and fell asleep.

_Dean laughed in his face as he began to punch him. Over and over again. Cas tried to stop him, not wanting to hurt him, but he was too powerful. Michael is ruthless and fierce. He's Heaven's greatest weapon. And Dean is the Michael sword, there's no way to stop him. Castiel's entire body ached, and he couldn't do anything about it._

_"Dean!" Cas yelled. "Please! Stop! Dean!"_

_But he couldn't hear him._

~~  
~~

Dean was researching on the laptop when he heard Cas turn in his sleep. Curious, he peered over the screen to see Cas tossing and turning. "Dean", Cas called out. Dean frowned and walked towards the bed to wake Cas up. As he got closer, he saw the pain written on Cas' face. "Dean. Stop. Dean, please. Dean", Cas continued to mutter.

Carefully, Dean shook his shoulders. "Cas", he whispered. "Cas. Wake up, it's just a dream. Cas". Suddenly, Cas jolted awake. His eyes were blown open in fright. "Woah", Dean breathed. "Calm down. It was just a bad dream". Cas looked at Dean, and then at his surroundings. He soon relaxed and buried his face in his hands.

"I'm sorry, Dean", he apologised. "I didn't-"

"No, don't apologise", Dean interrupted him. Slowly, he sat down on the bed. "You shouldn't be sorry for having nightmares. Everyone gets them. Hell, I have them practically every night. It happens to the best of us".

Cas looked at him and hesitated to ask. "What do you dream about?"

Dean looked down at his hands. "Usually... about the people I couldn't save. The list is endless".

"How do you deal with it?"

"I drink", Dean replied. "It helps a little, but only temporarily. I haven't found a permanent cure yet, but if I do, you'll be the first to know". Dean smiled, which caused Cas to smile. Every time Dean smiles, Cas gets this fluttery feeling in his chest. And Dean's smiles are very contagious. Cas can't help but think he looks handsome when he smiles. If only he smiled more often.

"Has your research been successful?" Cas asked, changing the topic.

Dean stood up and walked back to the laptop, and Cas followed. "Not really", Dean stated. "It could be a vengeful spirit, but I'd have to check for EMF".

"What are we waiting for? Let's go now", Cas exclaimed.

"Hold on", Dean stopped him. "Sam and Jack will be back with food soon. We'll go after we eat". Cas sighed and joined Dean at the table.

Sam and Jack finally arrive with their arms full of food. Surprisingly, Sam didn't forget the pie this time. They sat down and ate while Dean began to tell his thoughts about what they're hunting. Cas wasn't really listening to what was being said, instead he focused on the tone of Dean's voice. It was soothing to hear, and Cas felt himself falling asleep again.

He just wanted one night without nightmares.

The hunt had gone well - it was, in fact, a vengeful spirit. After the long drive, they were back at the bunker. Everyone had gone off to their rooms to sleep (or play video games, in Jack's case), which left the bunker silent. Dean lay on his bed, staring up at the ceiling. He was having flashbacks to when Michael was possessing him. All the things he did. All the people he hurt.

Dean had just fallen asleep when he heard a scream. Immediately, he jumped out of bed with his gun. The screams echoed through the halls of the bunker. Silently, he followed the noise. Screams of agony rang in his ears. Memories of Hell flooded his mind. The screams of those he tortured. He hates himself for breaking so easily.

Suddenly, he found himself standing outside Castiel's room. His breath was caught in his throat. Cautiously, he opened the door and peered inside. He held the gun in a tight grip, preparing himself to fight. But he didn't need to. His body instantly relaxed when he saw Cas sleeping in the bed. Hair was sticking to his forehead as he thrashed painfully.

Dean placed his gun on the bedside table before gently waking Cas. It took a while, but Cas soon shot up in panic. When he saw Dean, he flinched away in fright. Dean's heart broke, yet he stepped back and raised his hands up in surrender to show he means no harm. Cas relaxed and pushed his hair out of his face. "I'm sorry to have awoken you, Dean", Cas apologised.

"Don't be", Dean replied. "I couldn't really sleep, anyway". He paused for a minute. "Do you wanna tell me what you were dreaming about?"

"Not really", Cas stated. Dean nodded before heading to the door. "Um, Dean?" Cas' voice sounded small and broken. When Dean turned around, he saw Cas huddled under his blanket. "Could you... could you stay with me? Please", Cas hesitated to ask. Dean cracked a smile and walked over to the bed.

"Move over", he demanded, joining Cas under the covers.

They lay awkwardly for a while. Neither of them spoke. Slowly, Cas moved closer to Dean. "Does it ever get easier?" Cas asked in the dark.

"No", Dean said, truthfully. "But soon, you won't know anything else. It'll become normal for you, and you'll accept it because what else are you supposed to do? You'll sleep less and less, and you'll find ways to stay awake. And other times, you'll embrace the nightmares because it reminds you that you're human. Reminds you that you can be scared. Sometimes, you'll embrace them to punish yourself".

Castiel turned to look at Dean in the dark. "Is that what you do?"

"Unfortunately".

Gently, Cas lay on his side and wrapped his arm around Dean. Surprised, Dean looked down at his best friend. Slowly, he wrapped his arm around Cas, and Cas placed his head over Dean's heart. "Why did I never sit down and force you to tell me this? You've been suffering for years, and I never tried to help", Cas whispered.

"Stop it. It's not your fault. I was the one who kept pushing you away every time you wanted me to open up. I never felt comfortable enough".

"But you feel comfortable now?"

Dean stayed quiet for a moment. "Yeah". Slowly, they fell asleep in each other's arms. They finally had a night without nightmares.


End file.
